BASIC NEEDS series / Relationships

BASIC NEEDS Being Met? Feelings are the Signal

time for self assessment

Time to take it off the tracks!!

The stillness of winter is finally upon us. The persistent and at times hectic motion of the holidays has ceased and some of us may feel the stillness and sense we’re at last alone with our thoughts. At the cusp where two years meet, it may be time to steer our mental engines off the tracks and into the stockyard for an annual inspection. For a rare few weeks where perhaps nothing critical needs to be done, it’s the perfect time for introspection, evaluation and realignment.

If introspection doesn’t come naturally, you’ll be comforted to know there are clear signals for determining if you’ve been on the right track in life. Those signals are known as FEELINGS, and what feelings can do for you is help you figure out if your basic needs are being met. I’m not going to tackle explaining in this post what all our basic needs are as human beings, but let’s just say that we all need some basic things in place to feel balanced and fulfilled, such as: food, sleep, human touch, love, and self-worth.

Recently, I came across a nice little list indicating how you might feel when your needs are being met. It included feelings like: thankful, hopeful, proud, energetic, and confident.

Then, I slowly surveyed the landscape of how you might feel when your needs are NOT being met. Unlike the positive-feeling list, each of the more negative-feeling words triggered a physical reaction, an instant recollection of when I felt that way. The negative list included words like: angry, disappointed, nervous, sad, hopeless, overwhelmed, uncomfortable, impatient, irritated, annoyed, confused, and lonely.

I appreciate coming across self-check reminders like this because I know the danger of leaving feelings unattended. If we don’t check the signals every once in a while and make necessary adjustments, we’re a runaway train headed for a major breakdown somewhere down the tracks. I’ve seen it in myself and I’ve seen it in those close to me. Each engineer is entirely responsible for the health of his or her own engine. If we don’t take the time to see how we’re doing in life, we’re potentially in for a rough ride.

I’ll spend some time in the next bunch of posts tackling a selection of our basic needs and reflecting on what it means to be off track with each of them. No doubt I’ll have plenty of first-hand experiences to share as examples. If you live long enough, you make plenty of mistakes and have plenty of opportunity to keep learning.

That’s always a good thing!

Hope you join me for the ride,

18 thoughts on “BASIC NEEDS Being Met? Feelings are the Signal

  1. What a GREAT post Sue and so very true although I’ve not really thought of it this way but wow it makes so much sense. I’ve been having some of those negative days lately some things that are out of my control. But it’s so important to take time to get those needs met. If one doesn’t do it, well one can’t be strong for anyone! Thanks for the reminder and I look forward to your future posts about this.

    • Thanks, Brigitte. As I suggested, unfortunately I know from experience what happens in the extreme when we don’t pay attention to these things. I know I’m not alone on this, so I hope there will be something of value in my writings to lead the way to some understanding for those that need it.

  2. You are not alone in disregarding your own needs that are not being met. Interesting topic and I’m looking forward to reading more of your posts on this topic. [note to self: body currently craving chocolate, need to go buy some tomorrow!]

    • Yes, chocolate… in every woman’s medicine cabinet, or at least should be! Maybe I’ll have to write a fun post at the end of the series that highlights all the different “band-aids” we use to pacify ourselves. 🙂

      Thanks SO much for stopping in and commenting. Nice to have another passenger aboard on this ride!

      • Talk about CHOCOLATE…………..CHOCEUR has the best COCOA DUSTED TRUFFLES….from Belgium………….I have ever had…….A perfect small bite and so satisfying…..Got them at Aldi’s grocery store….. during the Christmas season………and they don’t cost a fortune!.

      • Fine chocolate that doesn’t cost a fortune???? Oh, yeah! Sign me up!!! 🙂 I’m a sucker for LINDT chocolates with the solid outer shell and that gorgeous, creamy chocolate inside. Oh, lord, I think I’m feeling weak already!

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  5. This is really great and I’m so glad that I’ve found your blog! I’ve been feeling exactly the same recently in dark, dreary Berlin these past winter months. My friend has been speaking to me about meeting MY needs and the power of mindfulness. You have a really great way with words, I’m looking forward to reading more of your posts! Best wishes to you. 🙂

    • Thanks for the compliment, Whitney, and for taking the time to read my post. I just checked out your blog and the winter picture of Berlin looked quiet and beautiful. That stillness is just what’s required to do a little self-reflection! Your writing is so descriptive and lends itself well to travel blogging. Thanks for following!

      • You’re really very welcome! Berlin is wonderful and I’ve instantly felt at home here. Have you had the chance to visit the city? I’ve tried to do as much reflecting as possible, winter is a good time for this. 🙂 Thank you for the kind words about my writing, I really do appreciate that. I hope you have an incredible weekend, and thanks so much for reading!

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